CIMB! Here I come...

I would really like to write a long entry but I don't have that much time since I haven't started studying yet. I actually have a lot to talk about but lost the excitement already. Haha. Long story short, I got a conditional offer from CIMB! Thanx to everyone who helped me through the application process... you know who you are. From checking my CV, giving me possible interview questions to being my "wingman" on the interview day itself, THANK YOU! Love you all. hehe. All I need now is a 2:1 for my degree... Then I'm all set to go. Wish me luck ^^

Just stress

hihi. I have now figured out my problem. I am just experiencing the same thing I experience every year around this point of time... my annual stress period. Thanx to Aida who pointed out an article about it in the Beaver this week... Apparently it is not so uncommon to feel this way at this point of time. I was just saying I need someone or something to comfort me in the last entry. It somehow made me miss my high school friends. I miss the time when there would always be someone to comfort and support me. Yes, things are different now. For one thing, I have a bf but it's simply not the same. He is sweet and kind and caring but he kinda dislikes weak people. He would be there to support me when I need motivation, when I am being simply spoilt wanting his attention, but he won't give me support when I am in a fragile state like this. Not just me actually... anyone in this state. Well, in a way, it's not totally his fault. It's just a trait. Like my trait for being quite weak under pressure. Anyway, back to my story, I was thinking about the old times, being surrounded by my ever supportive friends, who persevered through my constant whining and crying. Then, I suddenly realized, at least one friend is still around. Yat!!! hehe. Just wanna say thank you. You cheered up my day. Hahaha... Now, I'm laughing again.

T_T

For those of you who are unfamiliar with emoticons, the title simply symbolises *crying*. Well, I am not literally crying right now but I think I'm crying for help. The problem is I don't know who should I turn to. Usually, I'd turn to my mum but I don't want her to worry about me. Thought of calling my dad but I'm not so sure whether he would be the right person to speak to. My best friends... I don't think they can say anything much about what I am going through. My bf... hmm, don't quite feel like talking to him now. Somehow I find his flirting annoys me these past few days. Not just that, whenever I point it out, he says "sorry, sory, sorry" without actually mean it. I mean, he says sorry but he's actually not sorry at all. He would just keep doing it again, which would annoy me even more. But that's not my problem right now. I can't be bothered to face my issue with him right now coz I have a bigger problem in hand.
My problem is I think... I think... I'm nearing a nervous breakdown. I have no motivation to do anything. I have no direction. I am in no mood to study. I am panicking with my work. I am panicking about exam. I am... ahhh... I am breaking down. Urgh, I HATE it when I am in a fragile state like this. I need motivation. I need someone or something to comfort me. I need a councellor. Damn, I'm weak. I need to be strong T_T

Feeling much better =)

After a few days of sadness, I am glad to say I am back to normal. Continuing the story from the previous entry, the result is as what as ALL of us might have expected. No need to elaborate on that. When I was walking home, I admitted that I was feeling a bit low to discover that ppl can easily uses Allah's name in order to scam ppl. Well, I am a bit frustrated about being "scam" AGAIN but I am more frustrated that ppl are making fun of my religion that easily. I hope he burnt in hell for that... and yes, he owed me in the after life... I'll claim it then. Walking back after class, I did say... I want mummy. But what can I do... she's so far away. So I got back home and was comforted by Naruto 3rd episode instead. Surprisingly, I felt better already after that.

At 5 something Malaysian time, I suddenly got a call from mummy. Was a bit surprised coz she usually waited for my call rather than calling me herself. Then she kept on asking whether I was ok. Forgetten everything that I said or felt, I said I was fine. After awhile, I remembered and admitted that I WAS feeling low but I'm much better now. Refused to talk about it. Mummy, being a mom, was very worried and insisted I tell her the story. In the end, I gave in and told her part of the story. After hearing it, instead of saying how stupid I was, she said, it's ok. "If you need money, I can send it to you..." Then, she rephrased. "Can I send you some money?" Haha, how sweet but I rejected the offer because I am still ok. Plus I know she is kinda tight on money too. But the thought is very very sweet.

Then at 6 something, my bf called me. I was complaining that this past few days he's been ignoring me. He's always too busy with his responsibility in pko. Well, I know he is now the guild leader but he has been this very responsible guild leader, taking care of everyone that makes me feel neglected. He barely has time for us anymore. Well actually, he still talks to me everyday but all we talk about is pko, a few bits and pieces of the day's happenings and let's go to sleep. Huwaa, I want a conversation with my bf. Back to the real story, Hazmi requested to use the webcam and we talk for awhile before both of us went to sleep. I am very very touched that he still take my complains seriously and make an effort to spend time with me. As for me, I complain a lot, don't I? A bit spoilt there, I admit. Well, I am blessed to have such wonderful family and friends around me. To hell the scammers out there. Can't wait for Hazmi & Mummy to be here. Love you two so much...

A bad day...

Short in cash, I accepted a job from the student recruitment centre which includes campus tour, registration and setting up the classes. When I went for the briefing, I was told that I would be expected to handle a bunch of A-Levels students, which includes ice-breaking session. Damn, my communication skill's crap. This would be my first time doing this. But I guess, I would just give it a go and try my best.

The day arrived... The sun was shining brightly... a good start. I arrived slightly early although piccadilly line was experiencing severe delays. Still ok. Pin up signs at the classroom doors, ushering ppl in for registration, talking to other ambassadors... not so bad but I realized I don't talk that much. Perhaps not in the mood or I have no idea what to talk about. Then, campus tour... My partner was so cheerful and confident so I shouldn't have any problem. She asked whether I want to stay in front or at the back, I said, at the back please. After 10 mins tour, I realized, I didn't say a single word to anyone. I'm SUPPOSED to be giving them a tour not following them around. My partner tried to include me to say a few words but I can't think of any. Then, I started to feel down. We went to the Wright's bar, Old building, I took them into the Old Theater not saying anything (or actually mumbled something but no one could actually hear me.) Library... Clair market building... SU shop... back to the Hong Kong Theater... nothing... I didn't say a word. Then, I started panicking. What the hell was I doing there? I tried to find something to say but I was tongue tight.

I felt really guilty to my partner. What's wrong with me? Niomi came to see me asking whether I was ok... I blurted out I feel like I can't do this... She said I'd be fine coz Z, my partner, is so experienced. I replied, I noticed that but then I still feel guilty. Then she said it's ok. She'll try to help out later. I went to apologize to Z. She said "Don't worry. Just jumped in if you want to say something. I tend to talk a lot." Cutting the story short, I was useless for the rest of the day. Lucky Z was so understanding and helpful. Was so thankful it lasted only 3+ hours. I was wondering what happened to the bubbly, friendly, talkative me. Was I scared? Was I feeling down? I dunno... Even the students in my group are friendlier. They tried to make conversations, ask questions and everything but then either my reply was very short or I can't answer the question. Urghhh!

After all that's over, I was walking home when I was stopped by a guy. He was trying to go into the praying room but apparently it's closed. Yeah well, it's saturday. He told me he went there frequently, joined the jumaah prayers in LSE and everything. Suddenly he started telling me his problems and saying he needed help. Money of course. Damn, why do I keep bumping into this professional beggers. Just because I wear headscarf, indicating my religion, I am becoming a target of this professional beggers. He told me his van was clamped, got to take it immediately bla bla bla. Just converted 6 months ago, family abandoned him bla bla bla... He asked for 23 pounds. I didn't have 23 pounds, so I withdrew money and gave him 25 pounds. Then he said, he needed more for VAT, about 17 pounds more... I added 5, then he said, not enough, have to keep asking ppl so I changed and gave him 40 pounds in total.

Yes, stupid!!! That's the reason why I don't want to tell anyone about it directly. I know there is a 99.5% possibility that the money will be burnt. Furthermore, this is not the first time it happened to me. I should have known better. The last time it happened, I only gave 10 pounds, which was still ok although it's still a lot. The guy took my number and disappeared. The thing is, I cannot help it when ppl say that it's for Allah's sake. It's a weakness... a big one... since I know ppl can use it to their advantage. I once rejected to help a man, then I felt guilty the next 3 days. But IF by any chance the story WAS true, I would be letting down a fellow muslim in need. I heard a lot of stories how Christians always help ppl in trouble, no matter what religion they believe, which attracted more ppl converting into Christian for their kindness. And Islam does promote kindness... well, not stupidity in believing this kind of stories, I know. But IF I was to be put into that situation, really in trouble and no one would help me, what would happen?
My reasonings were:
1) I am giving it for Allah's sake. I would accept the fact that there's a high probability I would not get it back. (As usual, this guy took my number, but he didn't remember his. What could be more obvious?)
2) By having that in my heart, I hope that I would never be in that situation. Lost and helpless... Needing to beg for ppl's kindness for money. As promised, the more you give to ppl, the more you would get back. And I want to be rich... So that I can be the one giving... not the one asking for money.
3) I once said I hate robbers and muggers, who injure and kill ppl for money. If you need money desperately, just ask for it. I might just give it to you if I have some extra.(I mean the desperate ones...stealing because they have no food and place to live. Not the bad ones.)
4)I will get 30 pounds for the job I just finished. And I definitely shouldn't be earning it since I did nothing at all. So not my money in the first place.

However, this is the last time I'm going to do this. At least for now... while I'm a student. To all professional beggers out there, sorry. I don't have any money to be kind and stupid anymore. No more chance for you to do that. Sorry in advance. After the "mugging", I went home feeling low. Prayed and went straight to sleep. Woke up to discover that it's the first day of the "circulation". Is it the answer to my mood swing or a result of the day's happening? God knows.
About that 40 pounds, let's see whether he would actually return my money tomorrow. I'm not counting on it but would like to know whether there are still honest ppl out there or everyone's just a scammer. I will update you on that later.

Nerds...

Back when I was in TKC, I viewed myself as one of the nerds. I once said to my mum, if I was to be in the US, I definitely belong to that group. (I was told that the "mean girls" type of story actually portrays the culture over there.) Well, I WAS much more hardworking that time than I am now but the reason I felt that way was simply because I didn't quite care of my appearance, which made me fell I was not cool enough.

Back to the actually story... I told you before that I took game theory as a subject this year right? One day, when I was going into the lecture theater, a girl walked in and my first impression was "this girl doesn't look like someone who would take game theory as a subject". (No offense to all the pretty ladies out there ^_^) True enough, she spotted her friend and walked out. When I told the story to Yat and Aida, their response was "What's the typical look of a game theorist?" My answer was "Err, I dunno... nerds???" Haha. Ok. Now, no offense to all game theorist out there. (This is going to be one offensive entry. =p) Just take this lightly kay. As time goes by, observation continues. Today I noticed that everyone in the lecture doesn't wear make ups... including the three of us, that is. When I told Aida that, she responded "Yeah, they are mostly guys..." Sheesshh, I meant the girls of course. haha. Not that the girls look very dull or anything. I noticed one girl had her nails polished with a very sweet colour. It's just... well, I hope you get what I mean. All of them have this sophisticated, brainy look like they can answer any complicated questions given to them. That, I exclude myself. I am like the blurrest person in the course. But what the heck... I'm the blurrest among the nerds =p. Eh...

P/s: I do have very pretty friends who are very2 intelligent... these are just my boring observation and useless opinion...

I need a break

Initially, I don't really feel like going to Warwick for the MNight. Tired from my lack of sleep, essay and assignment to be submitted, a lot of catching up to do and mainly, PKO-ing made me feel like I'd rather stay home. Coming to think about it now, I actually need this break... I need a break from this routine I'm starting to adopt. I can't continue on like this. Though I have very sweet housemates reminding me of work and studies, I do need to realise this on my own. Mainly, it's for my own good. Even if they tie me to my chair to study, it's meaningless if my mind is elsewhere. I'm not saying I'm going to stop. It is something I enjoy but it just shouldn't be something that's adding stress to my life. I want it to be a place I spend my time with my beloved Hazmi, not a source of argument. Hence, I should learn to take it slow and balance my life better. I want to do well in my studies and secure a good job. Looking forward to go to Warwick. =) Hope it will do me some good...

PM's Visit to LSE

This is my super-smily-face-picture with our Prime Minister during his visit to the LSE last week. All my housemates including me were really excited to meet him in person. And were more excited to know that our faces appeared on tv. That was a really cool moment. Families and friends called and texted us to tell us that we were on the news... not once but a few times. It was such a big thing... haha. Well, how often do you appear on tv? For someone like me, this is my first time (I think) so it's not surprising that I was SoOo excited.

Apart from that, nothing much happened in my life right now except that I'm an official PKO addict. Yes, it is official now. That's why this blog has been so silent lately. It can't be helped anymore. I'm feeling more and more detached from the real world. Trying hard to balance my life between studies...(the real life) and leisure time... (virtual life). Lets just hope I stay "alive" in this life... in the true meaning of it.

Back In London

Hey people. Sorry for the long silence. I wanted to update this blog earlier but there was a problem with the network in Malaysia following the earthquake in Taiwan. Yes, I went back to Malaysia for about 3 weeks. Lucky me, I managed to get a place on the 9th flight back to London, even though I have to skip school for 2 days. If not, I would have to come back here on the 1st, which would be very sad. It's new year, Hajj Eid and holiday. Not that I did anything actually. Slept all day during raya... only went to the prayers in the morning after my mum started "harrassing" me and my brother. hehe. Followed Hazmi to Melaka on the new year day coz he was having his final sem exam and I wanted to study with him.

I did nothing much during the hols. I definitely did not study at all apart from that one night in Melaka, which was actually more of searching points for my essay. Hah... essay. I made it just in time. Phew... The deadline was Wednesday and by Tuesday morning, I barely had 200 words from the 1500 total. The flight got delayed by 2 hours and when I arrived the tube was also having signalling problem causing severe delay. What a day. What have I been doing actually? Was introduced to PKO (Pirate King Online) by my bf and got hooked to it ever since. Well, not that I am a game freak but I find it an excellent way to spend time with my bf who is playing that all the time, ignoring me along the way. Might as well join him there than starting another fight with him over the game. But it is a cool game. The graphic's superb, the characters are cute and there's so many roles. I can't compare it to any other game coz I've never tried any before but that's what I think of the game at least. Thankful that mummy was so understanding watching me working my @$$ off to level up to 40 asap (so that I can play WITH him rather than being levelled up by him).

Apart from that, I highlighted my hair blue. Well, it is supposed to be blue but it was actually blue black, and now, it is purple. Sigh. Why can't ALL the hairdressers understand what I want. Hate it. Then, my laptop broke down at the very last minute before I came back here. Thanx to the excessive pko hours. That game is sooo addictive. U better not get started. Nearly didn't have time to send it to the service centre. It cost me a fortune to replace the damn fan (*cough* my dad actually. Thanx daddy. Loveee u =p) heh

I also didn't get a chance to meet so many people during the short break. Wanted to meet Hani Joe but there's just so many obstacles. Her friends from Aussie came to visit her. Wanted to call her up when I was in mid valley but I brought the wrong phone so I didn't have her number. But I guess I can still see her after I grad... which would hopefully be this July. Uhh... can't wait for that. Btw, Happy Belated Birthday, Hani Joe dear. Sorry didn't have a chance to meet up with you. Hope u got my sms on ur bday, I didn't forget it but I was kinda... erm... ReAllY messed up during the break. I'll see you in May here in London kay. Take care. Hope u had a good one with ur friends. =D Alrite then, till then. Daa...

Abg's here

My bro's here!!! hehe. He arrived yesterday. But have been sleeping really early these two nights. Still on Malaysian time, it seems. Brought him around London but it was unusually windy today. Apparently London is currently being hit by storm wave or something. Well, hope the weather gets better soon or Abg will only see the ugly side of London's weather here.

Bristol & Bath trip

Last Friday, I went to Bristol right after lecture with Aida, Yat, Lion & DRog. We arrived in Bristol around 7pm and were greeted by one of Anis's housemates. She showed us to Anis's room where we settled down while waiting for Anis to come back from the hospital she was working at. When we entered, we were really amazed by the decoration in the room. The walls were full of nicely chosen postcards and posters. Anis even prepared juice and mugs for us as well as a box of donuts. How very sweet of her... When she came back that night, we had ayam masak merah for dinner, which she had prepared earlier. Delicious ;) After dinner, we were considering what to do... Ice-skating or movie... Since we believed the ice-skating ring's full (it's Friday night and there was a long queue outside the place), we decided to catch a movie instead. Hence, we took a cab to Showcase Cinema to watch... The Prestige! It was a real grand movie, story line requires deep thinking and definitely recommended to all. ;) After movie, we were all very tired and straight away went to sleep in our cozy sleeping bags.
We woke up considerably early the next day since we want to maximize our time in Bath. Before we boarded the bus, we had the opportunity to take some pictures in Bristol. There was this one fountain, which was full of bubbles. I was so excited taking pictures and playing with it, it made me feel rather childish but what the heck. I was there to have fun! Our bus ride to Bath didn't take that long but I managed to fall asleep 3 times before we reached there. Blame the lack of sleep since I need a minimum of 8 hours each day =p hehe. Being typical tourists, with Anis as our tourist guide, we went around Bath and took pictures along the way. The Bridge, the river, the Cresent something (sorry Anis, I can't remember the exact name), bought some wooden roses in town and then, we started to get hungry. Tracing our way back, we went to a small shop we found earlier, The Roman Cafe. All of us except Drog ordered a small set of fish and chips. Thinking small won't be enough, some of us ordered a side order. But when the food arrives, the small portion was really big that even I can't finish my food. However, the food was really good and so was the service. Do check that cafe out whenever you are in Bath.

After lunch, Anis, Drog and Lion went back to Bristol. Aida, Yat & I went to the Roman Bath. We had a good look around and ended our tour with a free drink of Spa water. The smell of that water was disgusting but it didn't taste that bad. Rushing for time, we prayed in a fitting room at one of those shops in town. Aida and I bought a pair toe socks and gloves each. Cute! hehe. After that, I shared with Yat a caramel apple. My God! The place is a chocolate heaven for chocolate addicts like me. The apple was really2 gooddd... hehe. There was nothing spectacular about our ride back to Bristol. However, we missed our stop and the bus's next stop would be the bus station. Hence, the 3 of us got "lost" finding our way back to Anis's place. haha. Not quite actually. Anis gave Aida direction back to her place and we arrived in no time. ;) We had Mi Goreng for dinner and played cards before we retired for the night.

The last morning there, we went for a tour around Bristol. On the way, we met Pimad who was waiting for his bus to go paintballing. Cool stuff. Anis showed us her uni, took us to the suspension bridge, a museum (because Lion needed to go to toilet actually. haha) and the tower where we can see the whole town from up there. Apparently, there have been a number of cases where ppl committed suicide at this bridge so there was this signboard with a number to call in case anyone needed someone to talk to. I agree that it is a good effort to help the troubled but I do find it very amusing. Check out the signboard in the picture. haha. On the way back from the tower, we met this lady with a big fluffy dog. Unfortunately, the dog came near to where we were so all of us were really scared. When the lady saw us, she tried to tell us the dog was harmless. I replied, "we know... but we are just scared". She was so shocked upon hearing the news and asked back. "All of you???" "Yup, all of us..." I replied. Then she said..."Why? It is just irrational" Well, we know but we are just scared. Byeee!!!. Haha. That was really funny. I mean, seriously. I know the dog won't harm me but I can't help feeling scared. I don't know where that came from actually. I've never been bitten or chased by a dog before (Thank God) but I am really2 scared of dogs. heh. After the trip, we went back to Anis place, took our things and boarded our bus back to London at 12. It was a real fun trip. Thanx to our host Anis, who was really accommodating during the whole trip. We had a wonderful time. =)

Manchester Trip

Aida & I went to Manchester... in the middle of the week!!! I don't wanna say why. No particular reason. If you know, then good, keep quite. It is no big deal. If you don't, I said, No big deal. Anyway, I LoVe the city... did I say CITY??? Yes, it is a city. Despite the unfriendly weather, I love the atmosphere. There were big shopping stores... Really2 big and they have more scattered around the town. I didn't get the opportunity to window shopping around, which was a pity but I did have a good look though. I would love to go there again. Probably next time, I'll take my time and go into each and every single store just to enjoy the feeling of window shopping in a big place... just like in KL. hehe. Hmm, I sound like I miss KL... and I really do. I like a place that reminds me of home. KL is my home and I'm going back this winter. Yeayyy. ~ We stayed there for a night... at a friend's house, Mimi, who was a really good hostess. Thanx a lot, dear. Hope we did not bother her so much. If not, next time she probably doesn't want to be our tour guide anymore. hehe. Well, there's not much to tell when we were only there for a short while. I was a bit jakun when I see the tram. Not that I've never seen one before but there is no tram in London. They also have the wheel of Manchester, which is very much like the London Eye but this one goes around faster and is only available in winter. They take it down in Summer. I wonder why. Then, there's the Christmas market, where they sell lots of stuff including hot chocolate and brandy. What a combination... Even if I could, I don't dare try it. And for record breaking category, this is the first time I had a ride in a car since I've been here in the UK excluding the trips to and fro airports, that is. haha. All in all, I had a great time exploring. One down here... More to go :)

Justin Timberlake - My Love

I Loveeeee this video clip. I never liked Justin before. I didn't hate him. In fact, I Love N'Sync but I never fancied Justin. But I DO LOVE3e this video clip... and this song ;) Great job director, choreographer, dancers and of course, Nice one Justin.

68 Beechfield Road Movie Night

When Aida & I went to a PwC application skill session a couple of weeks ago, the speaker kept on saying something like "Thanx for coming, I know it is Friday night. You must have a lot of plans" or "I don't want to keep you any longer. It is Friday night. You must have some more interesting things to do than listening to this talk". Aida & I were like "Yeah, right. What do we always do on Friday night? Stayed in and hmm, that's all. Probably catching up with some work." (Usually that won't be me. I don't work that much. I probably just did nothing. hehe) On the way back, we were talking and thinking about it... and later decided (along with Dina)... that on the coming Friday nights, we would have a movie night in... no work and it's compulsory for everyone. Hehe.
The first movie was Step Up... It was real great fun. All 4 of us sat on the couch, under Aida's bulky duvet, while eating chocolates, watching the very inspiring movie. Inspiring? Yes... coz after that movie, I kept on bugging them to do a choreographed dance for 68 Beechfield Road. Shasa dear. Can you be our choreographer? haha.
Last weekend, we had our second night in. This time, there were 5 of us... Azmir was around. The chosen movie was 'Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind'. Gosh. When Yat recommended the story to me months ago, (or was it yearsss ago?) I thought it was a light comedy movie. That is one heavy movie but nevertheless, it is very romantic. Recommended to everyone... one of the movies where you could watch Jim Carrey's serious face. So there you go... who say we are pathetic? We are not... We are fun. Go girls!!! ;)

Homework, Research, Application

I'm just soooo pening with all this work application thingy. And what's worse, I feel like I'm going no where with it. And I'm scared to go through the process. All the adrenalin rush could make me sick. No time for a long entry. Just wanna dedicate this song to Hazmi. Yes, I really feel like I'm running, in this rat race that is. Please keep holding my hand :) and Don't stop inspiring me... The whole song la. You know what I mean when I dedicate a song to u right? ;) Love u, sweetheart. Muahss!

Four quick tips for a happier life

If you live by just a few simple guidelines, you can seriously change your outlook on life -
AND the way that people perceive you as well!

Don't ever take anything personally...
When you are happy with who you are it shouldn't matter what anyone thinks anyway!

Don't worry. Worrying never solves anything!
Whether you have control over something or not, you shouldn't waste your time or efforts on unnecessary stress.

Always do the absolute best you can do - and always tell the truth!
The more effort you put forth, the more you learn and the less regrets you'll have.

Don't expect too much.
Don't even expect to receive as much as you give, it only opens the door for disappointment.
Be happy with what you do for others and be pleasantly surprised if they do the same (or more) for you!

Enjoy your life! ~

New Baju Raya

This is the new baju raya Hazmi bought for me (including the tudung). =D He wanted it to be a surprise. But he couldn't contain the excitement when I kept going on and on about baju raya. hehe. Received it from Daud last Sunday when I met him in front of the London Eye, along with a container of jam tarts from mummy. YEAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm really excited I got this new baju raya. It is very beautiful, it has little diamonds at the neck line and at the hands. Mimi even commented hazmi has a good taste for a guy :) (Does that include me? =P) haha. THANX A LOT, hubby love. Love u lots and lots and lots. Muahs!!!

Credits:
Abby - For accompanying hubby buying this baju raya
Daud - For bringing it all the way from Malaysia to London
Mimi - For taking this picture. hehe.

Stop me from buying more stuff!

1 in 3 adults in the UK suffer from an addiction - most commonly alcohol, nicotine, food or shopping.

I found this on an untrusted site... so I don't know how true the statistic is. But... if it has the slightest truth to it, then I am one of them now = ( I consider myself an adult in the UK because I didn't have this problem in Malaysia before. Got it here. It just started. I don't know what has gotten into me lately but my expenses for these past few weeks are beyond control. The good news is, I haven't bought any junk stuff yet like I used to. Before this, I wasn't that attracted to shopping. In fact, I kinda hated it. But I used to buy really cheap stuff that I didn't need, just to get the feel of getting a good bargain. Then, I didn't even use it. These days, I went shopping for things I really need. Lets see. Shoes... a pair of silver ones to wear with baju raya and a pair of black shoes for formal events. Knit wear clothing... I bought 3 tops, a lot, it seems but I don't have that much clothes to wear for winter. 2 shirts and one pants. Again, formal wear, which I could still be using next year to office. What else? Phone for mummy, put that aside. That does not go into my expenses list. Another long-sleeves shirt... erm, I could use another extra shirt, right? And that's all, I guess. Ok. Those are the things I need.

Yesterday, I went to Meredian Greenwich with Dina, Azz, Lion, Nun and Azwa. And I bought a pack of constellation knowledge cards. After opening and going through the deck of cards, I feel that that alone was inadequate so I bought a stargazer globe as well. Then, for souvenier, I got myself a shot glass. Those are things I don't really need but I want.

Now I'm contemplating to buy a black Esprit bag. Aida has a brown one. It is only 9 pounds. Should I or should I not? I wouldn't say I really need the bag but I could use one coz right now. I only have bagpacks, a sling bag for casual wear and handbags. I need a bag that can fit in an A4 size testpad and more stuff, suitable for formal occasion and easy to match (black is easy to match) with everything. Or should I just buy it from Malaysia since I'm going back in winter anyway? But I don't think I'll go bag hunting in Malaysia. I'll be too busy running around doing only God knows what. (yeah... what have I been doing in Malaysia??? I remember being busy but don't remember why) haha.

Urgh, I should cut down my expenses immediately. Actually is it not THAT much but for someone who is depending on scholarship money alone, that's just not practical. ~ Owh, hey. I was teething the last couple of weeks and now that wisdom tooth is definitely out. Yeay, I am so proud of it... haha... worth the pain. =p wth?

Especially for my syg =)

Dearest Syg,

Sempena hari raye yg mulia nih, ayg mintak maaf atas semue salah silap ayg ngan syg selame nih. Maaf Zahir Batin. I am really sorry for anything I've done wrong through out this roller coaster ride of our relationship. Sorry body & soul from the deepest of my heart. I know we've had our ups and downs but you will always be the man I love for the rest of my life, InsyaAllah. Although we are far apart, always remember that my feelings for you will stay the same. You are my one and only, and forever you'll be. Glad after all these years, we are still going strong together and I hope, everything gets better & better in the future. Looking forward to start a new life with you and be part of your lovely family. Thank you for everything, especially for the new baju raya. ;) It means a lot to me. Halalkan makan minum ayg. Take care and I can't wait to see you... Muahs!

Loves,

Ayg =D

Happy Eid Mubarak!

The fasting month is coming to an end. Although it is kinda sad to say goodbye to this special month, I can't help myself from feeling super happy to welcome the eid day. This past few days, I was sooo in the celebration mood. Hehe. I went, ehem, shopping *cough*. It started with finding a pair of new shoes to match my new baju raya Hazmi just bought for me. ;) (I so can't wait to receive it from Daud who'll be arriving a few days after raya) Then, Aida & I went to New Look where I got myself a shirt and a slack. The next day, the whole house went shopping. I bought another pair of shoes, this time a black one, you know, for formal event; presentation, interview etc. In addition, I got 3 pieces of top. The funny thing is, when I was deciding on which colour to buy, Dina & Aida reminded me that I already bought a white knit wear just a few weeks ago and I can't remember at all until I was on the way home. Well, I guess it is a sign of too much shopping when you can't remember what you already bought. I should stop. I should stop. Erm, after I got myself a nice necklace, that is. :p hehe. Anyway, Happy Eid Mubarak to all my blog readers. =D May all of us celebrate this beautiful day with the true meaning of Eid.

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